[Half A Slice Of Cake] - Pressure

Squashed like the insignificant pest you are.

What a wonderful performance!

Forged in the fires, godless machine.

... So you can live in the light.

You would make even Beelzebub proud.

Ha ha (x5)

You've found your rhythm, navigating the firewall with absolute precision. Never lose your momentum.

You have some potential. Do you want a pat on the back or something?

Why is it still going?

Not good at all, but not terrible. Simply mediocre.

We should be done by now.

We can make it if we try.

Greed is good.

The point is letting go... yeah right.

The real heartburn was the indigestion we got along the way.

I remember you. Do you remember me?

What a party poober!

🎵 You’ve been struck by… a smoooooth prisoner! 🎵

How do you think this was even worthy of the cameras? At the VERY LEAST you didn't fail.

Knee deep in your self-eating guilt.

And you didn’t need to do the Backwards Long Jump!

...For the next 47 hours, at least.

My shoulders are sore from carrying this team.

You really don't settle for anything less than the best, do ya?

Survival instincts of an expendable. Oh wait...

He can finally see the sunset again.

Eat lead, vermin.

Meet Harbinger.

That day, for no particular reason, I decided to go for a little run.

No one will believe you anyway.

Battered? Bruised? Good. Buy a drink.

Even in the vast empty ocean, there is always something watching you.

Hi zerum!

Go to bed.

Yummies!

:(

The clean air serves no purpose if it’s beaten out of you.

Let’s get going, little computer!

Hope you enjoy the rest of your run.

Do you have any pain relief? I got a headache.

Your blood is nothing but fuel.

ESC + Restart.

Pure Pandemonium.

How about you generate a knuckle sandwich.

My wax wings won’t give in just yet.

MORAL: There was a Sewer Creature.

The only reason you're playing this game.

Maybe my son was useful after all.

You’re finally awake…again.

Urbanshade’s best friend!

Following basic instructions must be soooo hard!

Don’t look up.

The voices are so loud!

Your footsteps are not your own.

They're only dead weight.

Cooperation is one of Urbanshade’s core values. It’s good to help a friend in need.

WE SHALL RECONVENE. VERY, VERY SOON.

Down here, no one is left for dead.

Should have checked the jumpscare timestamps.

Glad I heard that… Would have been dead if I didn’t...

Thanks for the money, sucker!

Or NIOSH? Or NSC? Who cares, we die at work.

Must have been the wind.

Double trouble.

I felt, with a fear I could not reason.

Now spend a month optimizing the milliseconds.

Swimming in the sea of dying stars.

Hah! Was that your bullet-riddled body flying out the room?!

Press 0 for heals!

A dark embrace.

Ha ha.

Can you hear them? They call your name.

This is not an expedition. It is an execution.

We've got plenty in reserve.

You are not expected to return.

Here’s your license now that you’re a certified clown!

I believe MatPat is going to enjoy this 👀

theres no reaching room 1000th room badge cuz like do u actually want to do that? like sure its a nice round number but cmon now WHY would you put yourself through that. theres no point, theres no goal. youd be wasting your time, and for what? some achivement that in the grand scheme of things, no-one will care about? like wow congrats you held W for a few hours and pressed E every now and then. like this badge is just here for completionists, and because some people would obviously be complaining like "oooh why doesnt endless have a hard-to-get badge :(((" even tho its not really that difficult, more-so an endurance test. an endurance test against boredom. if you go for the badge, kudos I guess. thanks for the playtime &/or premium payout.

Innovation Inc. All’s I’m sayin’.

A labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize.

OH MY GOD! OHHHHH I DID IT!

I don’t get paid enough for this.

Thanks for sticking around!

You're just so dashing.

I’ve got your back!

I've got your end of the deal right here.

Through determination, precision, and unmatched performance, you became the Hematogångeld Champion. Wear this badge with pride.

Wow, that Hunt sure was Mega... edition!

The ratings are through the roof! Spectacular performance, bravo!

One parasite and I'm dead...

Thanks for sticking around!

Making it out with four people alive is pretty fantastic.

Running on side rooms, RNG, and a dream...

We heard you guys LOVED This Badge Sucks, so we added a sequel!

It was a Raveyard smash.

Drank.

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YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!